As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so-called 'best friend'. I stared at her long, silky hair. I wished she were mine, but she didn't notice me like that. And I knew it. Afterclass she walkedup to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before, and I handed them to her. She said 'thanks' and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy. And I don't know why.

11th Grade

The phone rang. It was her on the other end. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, a Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked at me, said 'thanks,' and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her. I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy. And I don't know why.

12th Grade

The day before prom she walked to my locker. 'My date issick,' she said. He's not going to go. Well, I didn't have a date and in 7th grade we made a promise that if neither of us had dates we would go together just as 'best friends,' so we did. Prom night after everything was over I was standing at her front door step. I stared at her. She smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she doesn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said, 'I had the best time, thanks!' and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her. I wanther to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy. And I don't know why...

Graduation Day

A day passed. A week passed. A month passed. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home,she came to me in her smock and hat, and she cried as I hugged her. Then, she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, 'You're my best friend, thanks!' and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her. I want her toknow that I don't want to be just friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy. And I don't know why…

A Few Years Later

Now, I sit in the pews of the church. She is getting married, now. Iwatched her say, 'I do' and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine but she didn't see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said, 'You came!' She said, 'thanks!' and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her. I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love her, but I'm just too shy. And I don't know why...

Funeral

yrs passed, and I looked down at the coffin of the girlwho used to be my best friend.' At the service they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he were mine. But he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him. I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends. I love him, but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me… i wish I did too… i thought to myself, and Icried.

i think the story is so true. but everytime, its not this easy to make your true feelings known. seriously. i mean even between close friends, there's always this facade there, whats more with someone you love. for myself, i think i will never walk out of my habit of liking someone and not telling them. its just me. because i know not to lift my hopes high, coz it'll hurt more when i fall. furthermore, no one has spurred me to verbalise my feelings. until elvin came and broke my habit in this on-going eposode. well, that was a once-off and i'm like super sure it'll nv happen again. because it f***ing hurts right now. total regret.

was blog-hopping just now and came across this one-liner by a friend. hey friend, you know something, i have learnt to not trust you anymore. because i always know the answer. the know-your-feeling ability is getting lesser by the day. each time a qtn is posed, i will know your definate ans, even though you give a indefinate one. dont think yourself as the one-liner, because you might just describing your friend here. i wonder when our tele will come back.

i've told a few friends about this saying i've heard over the radio i think.

"secondary school friends are the ones who will be your longest lasting
friends."

i used to believe it. yet now, slowly, i'm not really swearing by it anymore. i feel that the friends i make outside sec sch are providing me more support than my sec sch friends. no offence though. ppl like LOVE, nightmare, des. they seems to listen to me more, and understand what i really need at each point of time. esp eli LOVE. seriously speaking, she's the only one i come online for. to chat with her every night. because i can release some of the unhappiness and share my happiness. she's the only one who will genuinely share them with me. and vice versa. no one else can provide that anymore. not even the one i used to trust and tried to hard to keep it up. well. this is part and parcel of life. friends come and go, but i will always try my best to hold on to everyone! =D

loser's going to INDIA tml. 3 weeks. siansiansian. means no one for me to complain and whine to. gosh.

posting's out tml. sians. tuesday date with LOVE cancelled. double sians. but at least i can cont'd saving so i can go for the much awaited shopping with LOVE at ease. =)

本周运势 19th - 25th Feb

魔羯座投资得利，财运亨通，但要谨防来得快去得急；一下骨头酸痛，一下肚子不舒服，健康亮红灯，浑身不对劲；出外游玩，易生旅游纠纷或与同行者发生口角。

and i suddenly miss him alot.

shall sleep early. promised LOVE to

傻瓜也許單純得多
愛得沒那麼做作
愛上了我不保留

Labels: friends, meaningful storys